Wednesday, August 27, 2003
Thanks to Stacey George for my five questions! I love this game and Stacey came up with good questions!
Interview game: THE RULES
1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your website with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed.
Questions for Christy:
1. I love your tag line, "random stories from a 25 year old, Catholic, partnered lesbian, with anxiety disorder" but I wonder about it, too. Why label yourself so definitely at the outset? What's wrong with your readers learning about you as they read your entries? Why do you think people insist on shorthand to describe themselves when they are so much more than that?
I created the tag line the day that I started blogging, which was about five minutes after I discovered that there was such a thing as a blog. At that point, I don't think I trusted my writing to speak for itself. I wanted people to know what they were reading in the outset so they could just move on if I was going to aggravate them. I have thought about changing it a few times...taking it away and just letting people figure it out on their own but I think the line tells people right up front what is important to me, in the most basic way possible. I am not sure why others use shorthand (labels) but the words I use in that first sentence indicate the qualities about me that are most influential. If you don't know I am gay, Catholic, and suffer from panic, you probably don't know me. These three things have influenced who I am to such a degree that to know them is to scratch the surface. Reading on, hopefully, helps people get beyond that surface. Also, I use it for shock value. I always thing using that line would get me on the Real World...strange but true.
2. Who taught you to knit? How old were you? What was the first thing you made?
I taught myself to knit this past Spring. You wouldn't know it because I talk about it like it is going out of style! I have a hard time sitting still while I am watching tv or just hanging out (my Mom does too- she calls it "restless leg syndrome"). I started knitting because it gave me something to do, other than just sit. I love to watch tv and movies but it is very hard for me to just sit. My Mom crochets and she tried to teach me when I was a kid, but I did not have the patience. I love knitting. It is totally calming to me.
The first thing I made was a blanket for our kitty Lulu. I bought a Learn to Knit kit for kids at a local art supply store. The patterns were for a scarf, a doll blanket, or a purse. I decided to make the doll blanket and give it to my kitty. She died in May- she had a heart defect and got a blood clot that resulted in the loss of her back legs. She did like that little blanket though. We put it in her little bed and she used to pull it out and drag it around on the floor.
3. You've written about going bowling... Big balls, candlepin or duck pin? We're both in the Boston area, so are there some lanes you'd recommend? I love the Milky Way in JP, but that's me.
Actually, I am in Philadelphia. I bowl at Breakers/ Playdrome in Cherry Hill NJ on Kings Highway. There is another Playdrome location where I sometimes bowl but I don't like it there as much.
I stink at bowling. Really. I have no idea what those choices mean that you listed. I guess big ball. Heehee. I usually bowl with the lightest ball I can find that has holes my fingers will fit into. When I was in high school, I bowled with my friend's little brother's 6 lb Mickey Mouse ball! Now I usually bowl with an 8 lb ball, 7 if I can find one.
4. When did your anxiety disorder begin to manifest itself? Was there a traumatic instance, did it develop slowly or have you always been agoraphobic?
I can trace my first panic symptoms to when I was 12 years old. I got asthmatic brochitis after having a bad allergic reaction to hay (will never go on a hay ride again!). Shortly thereafter, I would occasionally get feelings that felt like those asthma attacks- I would not be able to catch my breath, I would feel light headed, etc. In high school, I was in a very unhealthy friendship/ relationship. After we would argue or I would be worried that my friend my hurt herself, I would get chest pains and shortness of breath at night. At the age of 17, I had a battery of tests done which resulted in the docs telling me "It is just stress." No diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, no recommendation to seek counseling.
Senior year in college I was very worried about what I was going to do after graduation and started having panic attacks in my sleep and during class. I thought I was going crazy. A good friend who was a College employee and a Masters in Counseling student preliminary dignosed what I was experiencing as panic attacks. She referred me to our counseling center. I had a few sessions of counseling and learned breathing techniques.
Real panic onset: the anniversary is next week. I can't get that fact out of my head. It was the day after Labor Day 2002 when I admitted that my panic was interfering with my daily life. I was staying home from work for fear of panicking in public. I went to my primary care doc, a psychiatrist and a counselor. I was diagnosed with panic disorder with agoraphobia. I started weekly therapy and started taking Paxil and Xanax. I used up all my paid time off from work and then took medical leave. Overall I only worked two full weeks (Monday- Friday) from September- December. Most weeks I worked 1-3 days. Some days I could only work a half day. It definitely got worse before it got better. I finished therapy in March although I have considered the need for starting again. I weaned off Xanax in December but am back on it on an as needed basis. My dose of Paxil has been lowered twice by a third. I have been at this dose since March but have recently considered needing to have it increased.
A little note here, we adopted Lulu on September 9, 2002- about a week after I realized my panic was an issue. I think that is why I am so obsessed with getting a kitty right now.
It is a daily effort to keep my panic managed.
5. How did you and Michelle meet?
We met in college. Michelle was a senior when I was a freshman. She dated one of my RAs throughout my entire freshman year of college. We became friends and stuck by each other when our respective girlfriends cheated on us with the same girl, also a good friend of ours. That's right, her girlfriend cheated on her in December with girl N. My girlfriend cheated on me in April with girl N. The following November, we realized that we had alot more in common than being dumped for the same girl. We had a wonderful friendship before we started dating and have been lucky for it to blossom into the wonderful relationship we have today. We will have been together for five years this Fall. I always love the Fall because I have such good memories of Michelle and I becoming closer and starting to flirt and test the waters back in Fall of 1998.
Funny story...Michelle really liked me and wanted to make her first move on November 14, 1998. We were at a happy hour and I was underage. I was smashed- the first time I was ever that drunk. She looked in my eyes, wanted to smooch me, and saw that I needed to hurl. I threw up in the ladies room AND the mens room of the bar that night and then passed out in her bed...all before 8:30 pm. The fact that we got together only two short weeks later is a testament to the love this girl has for me! She is a saint!
Okay. Well those are my answers. First five people to leave a comment saying that they want to be interviewed will get questions by the end of the week. I am only committing to 5. If my comments section is not working (it has been on the fritz), send me an email at cms519@yahoo.com.
Interview game: THE RULES
1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your website with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed.
Questions for Christy:
1. I love your tag line, "random stories from a 25 year old, Catholic, partnered lesbian, with anxiety disorder" but I wonder about it, too. Why label yourself so definitely at the outset? What's wrong with your readers learning about you as they read your entries? Why do you think people insist on shorthand to describe themselves when they are so much more than that?
I created the tag line the day that I started blogging, which was about five minutes after I discovered that there was such a thing as a blog. At that point, I don't think I trusted my writing to speak for itself. I wanted people to know what they were reading in the outset so they could just move on if I was going to aggravate them. I have thought about changing it a few times...taking it away and just letting people figure it out on their own but I think the line tells people right up front what is important to me, in the most basic way possible. I am not sure why others use shorthand (labels) but the words I use in that first sentence indicate the qualities about me that are most influential. If you don't know I am gay, Catholic, and suffer from panic, you probably don't know me. These three things have influenced who I am to such a degree that to know them is to scratch the surface. Reading on, hopefully, helps people get beyond that surface. Also, I use it for shock value. I always thing using that line would get me on the Real World...strange but true.
2. Who taught you to knit? How old were you? What was the first thing you made?
I taught myself to knit this past Spring. You wouldn't know it because I talk about it like it is going out of style! I have a hard time sitting still while I am watching tv or just hanging out (my Mom does too- she calls it "restless leg syndrome"). I started knitting because it gave me something to do, other than just sit. I love to watch tv and movies but it is very hard for me to just sit. My Mom crochets and she tried to teach me when I was a kid, but I did not have the patience. I love knitting. It is totally calming to me.
The first thing I made was a blanket for our kitty Lulu. I bought a Learn to Knit kit for kids at a local art supply store. The patterns were for a scarf, a doll blanket, or a purse. I decided to make the doll blanket and give it to my kitty. She died in May- she had a heart defect and got a blood clot that resulted in the loss of her back legs. She did like that little blanket though. We put it in her little bed and she used to pull it out and drag it around on the floor.
3. You've written about going bowling... Big balls, candlepin or duck pin? We're both in the Boston area, so are there some lanes you'd recommend? I love the Milky Way in JP, but that's me.
Actually, I am in Philadelphia. I bowl at Breakers/ Playdrome in Cherry Hill NJ on Kings Highway. There is another Playdrome location where I sometimes bowl but I don't like it there as much.
I stink at bowling. Really. I have no idea what those choices mean that you listed. I guess big ball. Heehee. I usually bowl with the lightest ball I can find that has holes my fingers will fit into. When I was in high school, I bowled with my friend's little brother's 6 lb Mickey Mouse ball! Now I usually bowl with an 8 lb ball, 7 if I can find one.
4. When did your anxiety disorder begin to manifest itself? Was there a traumatic instance, did it develop slowly or have you always been agoraphobic?
I can trace my first panic symptoms to when I was 12 years old. I got asthmatic brochitis after having a bad allergic reaction to hay (will never go on a hay ride again!). Shortly thereafter, I would occasionally get feelings that felt like those asthma attacks- I would not be able to catch my breath, I would feel light headed, etc. In high school, I was in a very unhealthy friendship/ relationship. After we would argue or I would be worried that my friend my hurt herself, I would get chest pains and shortness of breath at night. At the age of 17, I had a battery of tests done which resulted in the docs telling me "It is just stress." No diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, no recommendation to seek counseling.
Senior year in college I was very worried about what I was going to do after graduation and started having panic attacks in my sleep and during class. I thought I was going crazy. A good friend who was a College employee and a Masters in Counseling student preliminary dignosed what I was experiencing as panic attacks. She referred me to our counseling center. I had a few sessions of counseling and learned breathing techniques.
Real panic onset: the anniversary is next week. I can't get that fact out of my head. It was the day after Labor Day 2002 when I admitted that my panic was interfering with my daily life. I was staying home from work for fear of panicking in public. I went to my primary care doc, a psychiatrist and a counselor. I was diagnosed with panic disorder with agoraphobia. I started weekly therapy and started taking Paxil and Xanax. I used up all my paid time off from work and then took medical leave. Overall I only worked two full weeks (Monday- Friday) from September- December. Most weeks I worked 1-3 days. Some days I could only work a half day. It definitely got worse before it got better. I finished therapy in March although I have considered the need for starting again. I weaned off Xanax in December but am back on it on an as needed basis. My dose of Paxil has been lowered twice by a third. I have been at this dose since March but have recently considered needing to have it increased.
A little note here, we adopted Lulu on September 9, 2002- about a week after I realized my panic was an issue. I think that is why I am so obsessed with getting a kitty right now.
It is a daily effort to keep my panic managed.
5. How did you and Michelle meet?
We met in college. Michelle was a senior when I was a freshman. She dated one of my RAs throughout my entire freshman year of college. We became friends and stuck by each other when our respective girlfriends cheated on us with the same girl, also a good friend of ours. That's right, her girlfriend cheated on her in December with girl N. My girlfriend cheated on me in April with girl N. The following November, we realized that we had alot more in common than being dumped for the same girl. We had a wonderful friendship before we started dating and have been lucky for it to blossom into the wonderful relationship we have today. We will have been together for five years this Fall. I always love the Fall because I have such good memories of Michelle and I becoming closer and starting to flirt and test the waters back in Fall of 1998.
Funny story...Michelle really liked me and wanted to make her first move on November 14, 1998. We were at a happy hour and I was underage. I was smashed- the first time I was ever that drunk. She looked in my eyes, wanted to smooch me, and saw that I needed to hurl. I threw up in the ladies room AND the mens room of the bar that night and then passed out in her bed...all before 8:30 pm. The fact that we got together only two short weeks later is a testament to the love this girl has for me! She is a saint!
Okay. Well those are my answers. First five people to leave a comment saying that they want to be interviewed will get questions by the end of the week. I am only committing to 5. If my comments section is not working (it has been on the fritz), send me an email at cms519@yahoo.com.
Tuesday, August 26, 2003
Two knitting related tid-bits:
1: The power of the Grammar Avengers! I am fairly certain that this is responsible for the spike in my hits- 17 more than yesterday which is about 50% more than usual! My thought is this...People are on Wendy Knits, they see the button, they click on LIST SITES, and since there are only about 7 in the ring, they take a minute to surf and find me. If you are here as a result of the Grammar Avengers...welcome!
2: I am in LOVE with Bonne Marie's newest finished project. I am seriously considering making it although Bonne Marie is a knitting deity and I am a mere mortal. I think I might be able to figure out the combination in the same way she did. I like it so much more than the original Luminous Lace pattern. My reservations: A#1, It is nearly Labor Day. I am a new knitter but it occurs to me that I should soon start knitting things with sleeves since it is not going to be summer in Philadelphia forever. B#2 I am quite a bit chubbier than Bonne Marie. I am worried that it may not fall as nicely as hers does...although, and not to be crass here, but my breasts are big enough that the effect might be the same. Oh, I don't know!
1: The power of the Grammar Avengers! I am fairly certain that this is responsible for the spike in my hits- 17 more than yesterday which is about 50% more than usual! My thought is this...People are on Wendy Knits, they see the button, they click on LIST SITES, and since there are only about 7 in the ring, they take a minute to surf and find me. If you are here as a result of the Grammar Avengers...welcome!
2: I am in LOVE with Bonne Marie's newest finished project. I am seriously considering making it although Bonne Marie is a knitting deity and I am a mere mortal. I think I might be able to figure out the combination in the same way she did. I like it so much more than the original Luminous Lace pattern. My reservations: A#1, It is nearly Labor Day. I am a new knitter but it occurs to me that I should soon start knitting things with sleeves since it is not going to be summer in Philadelphia forever. B#2 I am quite a bit chubbier than Bonne Marie. I am worried that it may not fall as nicely as hers does...although, and not to be crass here, but my breasts are big enough that the effect might be the same. Oh, I don't know!
Monday, August 25, 2003
Michelle and I just watched Punch Drunk Love. Bizarre movie...good but bizarre! Adam Sandler looks just like Michelle's brother Johnny's friend Steven. Didn't mean to give a whole Ferris Bueller-like relationship list but such is life! Anyhoo, I think Emily Watson is just adorable.
Knitting news: I am rocking the Cleo! It is just flying by! Both triangles are complete, as is the lace band. I am three inches or so into the 7 inch stockinette stitch section. I can not believe how quickly this is knitting up! I can not say it enough...this yarn is a pleasure. Schaefer Yarns, Laurel- 100% mercerized pima cotton, in the Shari Lewis colorway.
Off to do more knitting!
Knitting news: I am rocking the Cleo! It is just flying by! Both triangles are complete, as is the lace band. I am three inches or so into the 7 inch stockinette stitch section. I can not believe how quickly this is knitting up! I can not say it enough...this yarn is a pleasure. Schaefer Yarns, Laurel- 100% mercerized pima cotton, in the Shari Lewis colorway.
Off to do more knitting!
New button on the sidebar...Grammar Avengers! Is that perfect for me, or what? I inherited my love of grammar from my Mom. In high school, her friend Patty would pass notes to my Mom who would then correct the spelling in red pen and send them back.
After 12 years of Catholic School, you either love grammar or you abhor it. I fall into the first category!
After 12 years of Catholic School, you either love grammar or you abhor it. I fall into the first category!
Sunday, August 24, 2003
Fun day yesterday! Michelle and I drove to Ocean City, NJ for the day. We have not been down the shore in two years. Last year we did spend one day on the beach in Vancouver but it has been two years since we sat by the Atlantic Ocean.
The best parts of the day...Mack's pizza and Kohr Bros. orange and vanilla ice cream cone. When I bit into the slice of Mack's pizza, I closed my eyes, sat back and said to Michelle "I am 9 years old, I am wearing shorts and a sweatshirt, and my hair is in a French braid." Every summer, I went to Wildwood, NJ with my family. My Gram and Pop rented a place for the summer and we went down as often as we could. Mack's pizza is a family favorite. Hoagies from A&LP (affectionately known as ALPO). Peanut butter on crackers and a glass of iced tea as a snack after the beach. Sitting on the porch eating frozen waffles (after being toasted of course) with lots of butter. Summer was my favorite time of the year. Cathy and I would pick houses on our walk to the boardwalk and imagine buying them as adults, hosting the family in the summer, everyone could stay with us. We had big dreams.
Michelle and I sat on the beach for 5 hours. We did not talk much. I did not read or knit. We mostly just sat. I looked at the ocean. I watched the families. I am in what Michelle calls "a baby phase."
Maybe getting a kitten this week will quell that. Heehee.
Knitting news: I am working on triangle #2 for the Cleo. It is moving along quickly. Let me just say, this is going to be one bold article of clothing. The yarn is hand painted- in 6 colors! It is a joy to work with. But it is LOUD, as my Mom would say. I will definitely post pics.
The best parts of the day...Mack's pizza and Kohr Bros. orange and vanilla ice cream cone. When I bit into the slice of Mack's pizza, I closed my eyes, sat back and said to Michelle "I am 9 years old, I am wearing shorts and a sweatshirt, and my hair is in a French braid." Every summer, I went to Wildwood, NJ with my family. My Gram and Pop rented a place for the summer and we went down as often as we could. Mack's pizza is a family favorite. Hoagies from A&LP (affectionately known as ALPO). Peanut butter on crackers and a glass of iced tea as a snack after the beach. Sitting on the porch eating frozen waffles (after being toasted of course) with lots of butter. Summer was my favorite time of the year. Cathy and I would pick houses on our walk to the boardwalk and imagine buying them as adults, hosting the family in the summer, everyone could stay with us. We had big dreams.
Michelle and I sat on the beach for 5 hours. We did not talk much. I did not read or knit. We mostly just sat. I looked at the ocean. I watched the families. I am in what Michelle calls "a baby phase."
Maybe getting a kitten this week will quell that. Heehee.
Knitting news: I am working on triangle #2 for the Cleo. It is moving along quickly. Let me just say, this is going to be one bold article of clothing. The yarn is hand painted- in 6 colors! It is a joy to work with. But it is LOUD, as my Mom would say. I will definitely post pics.
Thursday, August 21, 2003
Knitting news: Finished the chicKami! Hooray! I knitted on the train all the way down to DC and all the way back. And then I stayed home from work today- a combination of anxiety and anxiety-related tummy issues- I knitted all the live-long day. The cami fits great. The stripes look super cute and the wet finished product is on the ironing board taking shape as I type away.
I started right into swatching for the Cleo. My gauge is bizarre. After the crazy gauge issues with the chicKami I have decided to just adjust the number of stitches according to the gauge I am getting with the recommended size needles. The pattern calls for size 9 needles, 4 stitches to the inch. I am getting 5. I tried switching to larger needles but the weave is going to be too loose. This top throws modesty to the wind as it is. No need to be giving everyone a peep show as well. When I bought the yarn at my local yarn store (LYS), I opted for a hand dyed yarn that I thought would give the correct gauge with a single strand rather than double. I have gone to my LYS with double strand patterns a few times and each times they show me great yarns that will give me the gauge with a single strand. Perhaps I should start following pattern recommendations more closely and I would have fewer issues. Doubt it!
Re: yesterday's post- sorry for the drama. The post does not communicate a tenth of what my night actually was like. I wound up in hysterics about my anxiety, feeling like I am moving backwards instead of forwards in terms of medicine, and just generally being frustrated. The feelings of wanting a kitten are a tangible way for me to express my not being able to get what I want. The kitty thing is important to me. More important is being able to handle my anxiety. Right now, I don't feel as though either is happening. It is so frustrating.
My anxiety is in a major flare up... maybe it is hormones, maybe it is just anxiety rearing its unpredictable head. Each time I think I have this thing under management, it shows me who is boss. I know I just need to keep plugging along. Sometimes, like yesterday, it just wears me down and I feel like it is more than I can handle. I took a whole xanax last night- more than I have taken in one day in months- probably since December. Ever since I have weaned from taking xanax every day, I have been nervous about taking more than a half at a time. I don't want to be back where I was- taking more than one everyday in addition to my Paxil. My eyes were strangely dilated. I felt like my body was not my own. I prefer having control over my senses, my reactions. I like having reactions.
I started right into swatching for the Cleo. My gauge is bizarre. After the crazy gauge issues with the chicKami I have decided to just adjust the number of stitches according to the gauge I am getting with the recommended size needles. The pattern calls for size 9 needles, 4 stitches to the inch. I am getting 5. I tried switching to larger needles but the weave is going to be too loose. This top throws modesty to the wind as it is. No need to be giving everyone a peep show as well. When I bought the yarn at my local yarn store (LYS), I opted for a hand dyed yarn that I thought would give the correct gauge with a single strand rather than double. I have gone to my LYS with double strand patterns a few times and each times they show me great yarns that will give me the gauge with a single strand. Perhaps I should start following pattern recommendations more closely and I would have fewer issues. Doubt it!
Re: yesterday's post- sorry for the drama. The post does not communicate a tenth of what my night actually was like. I wound up in hysterics about my anxiety, feeling like I am moving backwards instead of forwards in terms of medicine, and just generally being frustrated. The feelings of wanting a kitten are a tangible way for me to express my not being able to get what I want. The kitty thing is important to me. More important is being able to handle my anxiety. Right now, I don't feel as though either is happening. It is so frustrating.
My anxiety is in a major flare up... maybe it is hormones, maybe it is just anxiety rearing its unpredictable head. Each time I think I have this thing under management, it shows me who is boss. I know I just need to keep plugging along. Sometimes, like yesterday, it just wears me down and I feel like it is more than I can handle. I took a whole xanax last night- more than I have taken in one day in months- probably since December. Ever since I have weaned from taking xanax every day, I have been nervous about taking more than a half at a time. I don't want to be back where I was- taking more than one everyday in addition to my Paxil. My eyes were strangely dilated. I felt like my body was not my own. I prefer having control over my senses, my reactions. I like having reactions.
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
How is it possible that I can travel to Washington DC overnight with a coworker I do not know well and be fine but then I get home last night and break down in tears in bed because I am overwhelmed by anxiety. How can I sit in two days of training in a different city and be fine but I struggled to get through a two hour meeting today with a room full of people I see everyday? I do not understand my anxiety. I sometimes feel that I am controlled by my panic. I know that I am the boss of my body, of my reaction, of the way I respond to my feelings. I did manage to go to sleep last night without having a panic attack and without xanax. I made it through the meeting today using positive self talk and a modified form of progressive muscle relaxation. I suppose I should be proud of that. I am not.
I feel tense. I have 25 minutes left of the work day and all I can think of is going home. I want to stretch out on the couch. I want to eat dinner. And then I want to go to the shelter and pick out a new kitty friend. I want someone in my life who will love me but not ask any questions. I want someone in my life who will snuggle with me and only want snuggling in return. I want a little baby who needs me more than I need her. I miss my Lulu and I want a new friend. I called the shelter. They have girl kitties. They are open until 7:00 tonight. I want to go there right after work. I do not want to pass go. Do not collect $200. Just go get a baby girl kitty to play with, to tease, to love, to feed and care for, to greet every morning and she winds between my ankles waiting for me to feed her.
I feel sad today. I do not want to take xanax. I do not want to be afraid.
I feel tense. I have 25 minutes left of the work day and all I can think of is going home. I want to stretch out on the couch. I want to eat dinner. And then I want to go to the shelter and pick out a new kitty friend. I want someone in my life who will love me but not ask any questions. I want someone in my life who will snuggle with me and only want snuggling in return. I want a little baby who needs me more than I need her. I miss my Lulu and I want a new friend. I called the shelter. They have girl kitties. They are open until 7:00 tonight. I want to go there right after work. I do not want to pass go. Do not collect $200. Just go get a baby girl kitty to play with, to tease, to love, to feed and care for, to greet every morning and she winds between my ankles waiting for me to feed her.
I feel sad today. I do not want to take xanax. I do not want to be afraid.
Saturday, August 16, 2003
I finally got to sleep in today! I can't remember the last time I woke up without an alarm. It was so great- sometimes the small pleasures are the best ones.
Went bowling last night as a goodbye treat for our friend Suzette who is moving back to Atlanta to start a three year program with the CDC. I still can't believe she and Michael have agreed to live apart for four months until Michael finishes his doctoral coursework here in Philly. I know married couples do this from time to time and it works out fine for them. I simply can not imagine ever doing it myself. I have to go away overnight for work this week and it is causing havoc in our house!
Sort of knitting news: I signed myself up for the "Knitting Bloggers Read" group. They are currently reading the Secret Life of Bees which I loved and would like to discuss so I thought "why not?" My actual book group is having our monthly meeting tomorrow. We are reading Katharine Hepburn's autobiography Me: Stories of My Life of which I have only read the prologue. Oh well, I guess I am just going for the company this month! I am currently reading The Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst and loving it. This is a really quick read and I love just flying through it on my lunch everyday. I have a two hour train ride to DC on Monday morning and I can't decide if I will spend it reading or knitting. At some point, I hope to master the art of doing both simultaneously!
Still have not made much progress on the chicKami. It was going so much faster the first time I knitted it...even though it would never have fit me! I hope to get some knitting done tonight. Michelle and I have a bunch of errands to run including food shopping and renting a DVD for tonight. Hopefully, I can settle down on the couch for a few hours tonight, watch the DVD (or more than one) and knit until my heart's content.
Happy Knitting!
Went bowling last night as a goodbye treat for our friend Suzette who is moving back to Atlanta to start a three year program with the CDC. I still can't believe she and Michael have agreed to live apart for four months until Michael finishes his doctoral coursework here in Philly. I know married couples do this from time to time and it works out fine for them. I simply can not imagine ever doing it myself. I have to go away overnight for work this week and it is causing havoc in our house!
Sort of knitting news: I signed myself up for the "Knitting Bloggers Read" group. They are currently reading the Secret Life of Bees which I loved and would like to discuss so I thought "why not?" My actual book group is having our monthly meeting tomorrow. We are reading Katharine Hepburn's autobiography Me: Stories of My Life of which I have only read the prologue. Oh well, I guess I am just going for the company this month! I am currently reading The Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst and loving it. This is a really quick read and I love just flying through it on my lunch everyday. I have a two hour train ride to DC on Monday morning and I can't decide if I will spend it reading or knitting. At some point, I hope to master the art of doing both simultaneously!
Still have not made much progress on the chicKami. It was going so much faster the first time I knitted it...even though it would never have fit me! I hope to get some knitting done tonight. Michelle and I have a bunch of errands to run including food shopping and renting a DVD for tonight. Hopefully, I can settle down on the couch for a few hours tonight, watch the DVD (or more than one) and knit until my heart's content.
Happy Knitting!
Wednesday, August 13, 2003
Knitting news:
The chicKami part deux is moving along nicely and at the correct gauge. Hooray! I only have a few inches done but I have been completely wiped out this week and have not done much knitting.
Bought yarn this weekend for the Cleo, one of Knitty's summer surprise patterns. I am really excited about starting this project. Hopefully the chicKami will only take a week or so and then, Cleo is my number one priority.
I knitted about 2 inches on the VBB this weekend. I was having gauge issues with the chicKami and had made four mice for the mouse-along in two days. I guess I felt like working on the VBB was the only thing left to do. I will finish it eventually...I guess.
Michelle is working on fixing the armholes on her first project. It a wrap-around sleeveless top from Family Circle Easy Knitting. She is adding a seed stitch border to close the arm holes which are enormous.
Non-knitting news: Have had some anxiety today. Felt shaky this morning but made it to work okay and was fine throughout the day. I felt a little jittery earlier tonight. I soaked in the tub reading the Life of Pi for awhile and I feel better. Only about 40 pages of the book to go. I have two books out of the library that I want to read and a whole load on my to read list. So many books, so much time spent knitting!
I am off.
The chicKami part deux is moving along nicely and at the correct gauge. Hooray! I only have a few inches done but I have been completely wiped out this week and have not done much knitting.
Bought yarn this weekend for the Cleo, one of Knitty's summer surprise patterns. I am really excited about starting this project. Hopefully the chicKami will only take a week or so and then, Cleo is my number one priority.
I knitted about 2 inches on the VBB this weekend. I was having gauge issues with the chicKami and had made four mice for the mouse-along in two days. I guess I felt like working on the VBB was the only thing left to do. I will finish it eventually...I guess.
Michelle is working on fixing the armholes on her first project. It a wrap-around sleeveless top from Family Circle Easy Knitting. She is adding a seed stitch border to close the arm holes which are enormous.
Non-knitting news: Have had some anxiety today. Felt shaky this morning but made it to work okay and was fine throughout the day. I felt a little jittery earlier tonight. I soaked in the tub reading the Life of Pi for awhile and I feel better. Only about 40 pages of the book to go. I have two books out of the library that I want to read and a whole load on my to read list. So many books, so much time spent knitting!
I am off.
Tuesday, August 12, 2003
News about the movie based on Jennifer Weiner's In Her Shoes: Cameron Diaz is in talks to play Maggie. I liked this book alot. I dislike Cameron Diaz ALOT. I can imagine that it is very exciting to have a famous person in negotiations to play a character you created, but if I were Jen Weiner, I might cry.
In fact, I think when selling the rights to my books (if I ever write any) I will find a lawyer who can find an airtight way to say "Under no circumstances may Cameron Diaz or Renee Zellweger be associated with this film."
Readers (all two of you), who would you ban from playing a character you created?
Comment away!
In fact, I think when selling the rights to my books (if I ever write any) I will find a lawyer who can find an airtight way to say "Under no circumstances may Cameron Diaz or Renee Zellweger be associated with this film."
Readers (all two of you), who would you ban from playing a character you created?
Comment away!
Monday, August 11, 2003
I left work early on Thursday with a weird stomach issue- maybe something I ate. Stayed home on Friday because I still felt awful. Realized on Friday as I was sitting on the couch knitting and watching Driven: Dark Roots, the Unauthorized Anna Nicole Story, that my chicKami looked really weird. The increases and decreases were too close together. I was nearly done the knitting that was to be done circularly according to the pattern but in reality still needed about 4 inches of knitting. What a nightmare...I had skipped the gauge step and boy, did it come back to bite me. Every book, web page, blog, pattern, etc I have read has extolled the wonder that is the gauge step. It is boring as all get out, but if you skip it, you end up like me- with over 11 inches of knitting that is useless! So, I frogged it (tearing out stitches for all you non-knitters- think rip-it, rip-it). So now, I have three rows of ribbing done, and I have needles that are two sizes bigger than the ones I started out with. I did the gauge step this time and I am so glad I did because I was tempted to simply go up one needle size but swatching showed me that I needed to go up two.
I have knitted four mice for Wendy's Mouse-a-Thon. I want to make some mice to send to our little buddies Lucy and Bowser (our friends' 3 month old kittens). For now though, all my mousies are going to the Mouse-a-Thon. These are quick little projects and a great way to learn and practice cables. This whole knitting thing amazes me. I always thought of myself as bright but never creative (I come from a family where I am the smart one, Cathy is the creative one, Angie is the good, sweet one. Bobby, as the boy, has sort of escaped this but at 13 years old and 5'10 he is of course the tall one! Not one of we three girls is taller than 5'4!). I have really surprised myself by not only teaching myself to knit, but by being willing to try new things, new stitches and techniques. And Cathy kicked butt at school this semester so now I guess we are all breaking out of our roles. Heehee!
Last week when I was sick, working on the mousies and thinking about sending them to Lucy and Bowser, I realized that there is a Christmas stocking for Lulu in with our Christmas decorations. And today, I was skimming the side bar of Michelle's blog and realized that she still lists "playing with Lulu" as one of the things she likes to do. I have really been missing Lulu over the past week. I guess it is because of Bowser and Lucy. I don't know. It isn't so much about wanting a kitten at this point as it is about missing my friend Lulu. My Mom thought it was so sad when I called Lulu my friend when she died but bottom line, she was. She stuck by me during the fall when my anxiety was out of control and I was literally afraid to leave the house. She was at home on those days when I left work early with borderline panic attacks and she would snuggle with me on the couch while I watched a movie. She sat on the side of the bath tub and batted at the bubbles when I was taking a bath a day to settle myself down. I feel sad when I see blogs with the Knitting Kitty ring icon on it because I wish I had my kitty and could talk about her on my blog. It makes me so sad to think about how little time she was with us- only 8 months. For a 10 month old kitty to have heart disease and to fall ill so suddenly was a terrible shock to both me and Michelle. I suppose it is understandable that we are still missing her.
I have knitted four mice for Wendy's Mouse-a-Thon. I want to make some mice to send to our little buddies Lucy and Bowser (our friends' 3 month old kittens). For now though, all my mousies are going to the Mouse-a-Thon. These are quick little projects and a great way to learn and practice cables. This whole knitting thing amazes me. I always thought of myself as bright but never creative (I come from a family where I am the smart one, Cathy is the creative one, Angie is the good, sweet one. Bobby, as the boy, has sort of escaped this but at 13 years old and 5'10 he is of course the tall one! Not one of we three girls is taller than 5'4!). I have really surprised myself by not only teaching myself to knit, but by being willing to try new things, new stitches and techniques. And Cathy kicked butt at school this semester so now I guess we are all breaking out of our roles. Heehee!
Last week when I was sick, working on the mousies and thinking about sending them to Lucy and Bowser, I realized that there is a Christmas stocking for Lulu in with our Christmas decorations. And today, I was skimming the side bar of Michelle's blog and realized that she still lists "playing with Lulu" as one of the things she likes to do. I have really been missing Lulu over the past week. I guess it is because of Bowser and Lucy. I don't know. It isn't so much about wanting a kitten at this point as it is about missing my friend Lulu. My Mom thought it was so sad when I called Lulu my friend when she died but bottom line, she was. She stuck by me during the fall when my anxiety was out of control and I was literally afraid to leave the house. She was at home on those days when I left work early with borderline panic attacks and she would snuggle with me on the couch while I watched a movie. She sat on the side of the bath tub and batted at the bubbles when I was taking a bath a day to settle myself down. I feel sad when I see blogs with the Knitting Kitty ring icon on it because I wish I had my kitty and could talk about her on my blog. It makes me so sad to think about how little time she was with us- only 8 months. For a 10 month old kitty to have heart disease and to fall ill so suddenly was a terrible shock to both me and Michelle. I suppose it is understandable that we are still missing her.
Thursday, August 07, 2003
Jennifer Weiner mentioned my crazy question about her writing process in her blog Snark Spot! Just a tiny mention but let me just say that I was memorable! So funny!
By the way, she could not stop singing that "fresh diaper" song during her appearance at Borders. That gal is crazy!
By the way, she could not stop singing that "fresh diaper" song during her appearance at Borders. That gal is crazy!
Wednesday, August 06, 2003
Knitting news: I am about 7 inches in on the chicKami. I realized on my first increase row that I was doing something wrong in my M1. I had four tiny holes where I had increased. Argh! I went back to the Yarn Girls Guide to Simple Knits and realized what I was doing wrong. Now all is right. Sweet relief. I am really hoping to get alot done tonight. I just love knitting this. I like knitting in the round. The idea that when I finish knitting, there are no seams to do (other than the three needle bind off for the straps) is such a wonderful one. I do think I am enjoying the cotton. For anyone who is wondering, it is Klaus Koch Clip in 116. This link will show it to you in other colors. Can't find a pic of the precise color, but trust me, it is gorgeous! It had better be for what I paid for it!
I really need to start asking the price for the yarn I purchase. I adore shoping at Sophie's but often the yarn is not priced (or I at least, do not see the price). I know I should just ask. It is one of those things though- I wonder if it is tacky to ask. Argh! Regardless, I just love this yarn but never in a million years would I have paid this much for a tank top if I was buying it in a store. I guess that is the nature of the knitting beast. Unless I want to knit in acrylic, it is going to be a pricey past time, at least until I have a good collection of needles and don't have to buy new ones with each project.
Non-knitting news: Had a great time at the Jennifer Weiner book signing last night at Borders. That gal is funny! I asked a question about her "process" and she launched into a whole thing about James Lipton and Inside the Actors Studio. She went on for about three minutes about how James Lipton sucks up to EVERYONE, including Melanie Griffith. (It seems like everyone is sucking up to Mrs. Banderas these days though. Don't even get me started on the New York Times Review of her performance in Chicago!) Jennifer's off topic comments were funny because (in the same way I feel about Rosie O'Donnell), I really feel like we have such similar taste in pop culture, books, etc that we could be friends. Of course she doesn't know that (Rosie never seemed to catch on either-heehee). I guess part of that is the nature of reading someone's blog regularly (and her spouse's). You start to feel like you know the person but they don't have a clue how similar your insights are, how you share a sense of humor, blah, blah, blah! Anyway, the place was mobbed, Jen was a hoot, Lucy Jane was gorgeous, and I got my copy of Good In Bed signed. A fun time was had by all!
I really need to start asking the price for the yarn I purchase. I adore shoping at Sophie's but often the yarn is not priced (or I at least, do not see the price). I know I should just ask. It is one of those things though- I wonder if it is tacky to ask. Argh! Regardless, I just love this yarn but never in a million years would I have paid this much for a tank top if I was buying it in a store. I guess that is the nature of the knitting beast. Unless I want to knit in acrylic, it is going to be a pricey past time, at least until I have a good collection of needles and don't have to buy new ones with each project.
Non-knitting news: Had a great time at the Jennifer Weiner book signing last night at Borders. That gal is funny! I asked a question about her "process" and she launched into a whole thing about James Lipton and Inside the Actors Studio. She went on for about three minutes about how James Lipton sucks up to EVERYONE, including Melanie Griffith. (It seems like everyone is sucking up to Mrs. Banderas these days though. Don't even get me started on the New York Times Review of her performance in Chicago!) Jennifer's off topic comments were funny because (in the same way I feel about Rosie O'Donnell), I really feel like we have such similar taste in pop culture, books, etc that we could be friends. Of course she doesn't know that (Rosie never seemed to catch on either-heehee). I guess part of that is the nature of reading someone's blog regularly (and her spouse's). You start to feel like you know the person but they don't have a clue how similar your insights are, how you share a sense of humor, blah, blah, blah! Anyway, the place was mobbed, Jen was a hoot, Lucy Jane was gorgeous, and I got my copy of Good In Bed signed. A fun time was had by all!
Monday, August 04, 2003
Knitting news: Am moving along with the chicKami and am now doing the knitalong. I think most people are done or nearly so but at this rate, I may be done by the weekend. I did not have much knitting time this weekend since Michelle and I went to visit some friends for the weekend. I am about 4-5 inches in though and am moving right along. I really love the color of the yarn although I am still not sure how I feel about knitting with cotton. It just has a really different feel to it.
Non-knitting news: I am really looking forward to tomorrow evening. Jennifer Weiner is doing a book signing and appearance at Borders on Broad Street tomorrow night for the paper back release of In Her Shoes. I can't wait!
I have started reading Life of Pi. Michelle just loved it and so far, I am enjoying it too.
Off to do more knitting and to watch Mildred Peirce. I love this movie!
Non-knitting news: I am really looking forward to tomorrow evening. Jennifer Weiner is doing a book signing and appearance at Borders on Broad Street tomorrow night for the paper back release of In Her Shoes. I can't wait!
I have started reading Life of Pi. Michelle just loved it and so far, I am enjoying it too.
Off to do more knitting and to watch Mildred Peirce. I love this movie!
Friday, August 01, 2003
I have been added to the Knitting Bloggers ring and the Queer Knits ring. Use the "Next" buttons below the icons on the right if you are interested in visiting other knitting and gay knitting sites.
Finished a baby pixie hat last night. So adorable. I will make some booties to match and have a momma and (in utero) baby in mind for this gift.
Bought some gorgous cotton last night at Sophie's Yarns for the ChicKami that everyone has been knitting this summer. I am making the fitted version with the wider straps. I was exhausted last night by the time I got home so I only cast on and knitted one row but am glad that I got it started. I am in love with the yarn! It is a fantastic blue and I got one hank of a creamy white to do a stripe. I really hope it comes out as great as I have been imagining it. I have been itching to knit this thing for weeks! I have been following the chicKami knit-along that has been happening and I just love looking at the pics of the finished products. Each person's comes out a little differently and I just love how creative people have been.
Yesterday was an incredibly long day. I had a short but good chat with my friend Kelly who is totally smitten with a boy! It is wonderful to see her so happy! Great people like our Kelly-belly deserve all the happiness in the world. I am glad she is having a good summer with some summer lovin'!
We had a movie night for the students last night- we watched Rabbit Proof Fence. What an incredible movie! The determination that Molly showed was just phenomenal. This movie so illustrates the resourcefulness of children. I definitely want to read the book!
The movie really made me think about the scope of injustice in our world. These little girls were taken from their families in an effort to destroy the proliferation of Aboriginal culture. I can't wrap my head around why people have such an issue with difference. It is a really simple way to say it but one of my coworkers summed it up perfectly this morning by saying "The world is filled with hate." I am feeling pretty sad today because of the President and the Pope. Both have made pretty sweeping statements this week and I just feel like I am under attack.
I wish things were more simple.
Finished a baby pixie hat last night. So adorable. I will make some booties to match and have a momma and (in utero) baby in mind for this gift.
Bought some gorgous cotton last night at Sophie's Yarns for the ChicKami that everyone has been knitting this summer. I am making the fitted version with the wider straps. I was exhausted last night by the time I got home so I only cast on and knitted one row but am glad that I got it started. I am in love with the yarn! It is a fantastic blue and I got one hank of a creamy white to do a stripe. I really hope it comes out as great as I have been imagining it. I have been itching to knit this thing for weeks! I have been following the chicKami knit-along that has been happening and I just love looking at the pics of the finished products. Each person's comes out a little differently and I just love how creative people have been.
Yesterday was an incredibly long day. I had a short but good chat with my friend Kelly who is totally smitten with a boy! It is wonderful to see her so happy! Great people like our Kelly-belly deserve all the happiness in the world. I am glad she is having a good summer with some summer lovin'!
We had a movie night for the students last night- we watched Rabbit Proof Fence. What an incredible movie! The determination that Molly showed was just phenomenal. This movie so illustrates the resourcefulness of children. I definitely want to read the book!
The movie really made me think about the scope of injustice in our world. These little girls were taken from their families in an effort to destroy the proliferation of Aboriginal culture. I can't wrap my head around why people have such an issue with difference. It is a really simple way to say it but one of my coworkers summed it up perfectly this morning by saying "The world is filled with hate." I am feeling pretty sad today because of the President and the Pope. Both have made pretty sweeping statements this week and I just feel like I am under attack.
I wish things were more simple.
